Author Archives: GreenHouse17 Staff

Kentucky stands out on this map, and it’s not for good reason. Every state in red or pink offers some some kind of civil protection for victims of dating violence who have not lived with or had a child with the abuser. Except Kentucky. 

Advocates and legislators have tried for years to address Kentucky’s lack of protections for dating partners. Darlene Thomas, our Executive Director,  talked about the need and efforts toward the law in this article. A bill unanimously cleared the House with the help of Judiciary Chairman John Tilley last year, but it faced an “uphill battle” in the Senate.

The Kentucky General Assembly will convene again in the new year. And advocates will again be working for dating violence protections.

Now’s the time to prepare. If you aren’t sure of the names of your state legislators, this information is available from the Kentucky Legislative Research Center website. You can also call the Legislative Message Line at 1-800-372-7181 to leave a voice mail for state officials. This line is open 8  a.m. to 4:30 p.m. Monday through Friday for most of the year. During General Assembly, the hours are longer.

This post is part of this year’s 17 Days/17 Ways Campaign to end intimate partner abuse.

By Zach Logue
Student Blogger

Special note: Today’s post is written by a freshman student at the University of Kentucky who is participating in a service learning project.

One way to help end intimate partner abuse is to reach out to someone who you think might be abused. A simple “Hey, is there something wrong?” or “Is there something you want to talk about?” could do the trick.

If you suspect the abuse is escalated, more specific and drastic measures may be necessary. These could include offering a place to stay and helping someone make a plan to flee the abuse safely. You can always call the 24-hour hotline operated by GreenHouse17 for help.

Some of you are probably asking, “How will I know if someone is being abused by their partner?” This is a good question. There are many signs to be looking for that could suggest someone is being abused by a partner.

Some physical signs of abuse include bruises, cuts or scars, marks on the neck, and dental injuries. Common signs of emotional abuse are fearfulness of others, inability to sleep, and depression. A tendency to cancel plans you’ve made or becoming less engaged in your friendship could also signal something is wrong.

These are only a few examples. Every situation is unique. The National Domestic Violence Hotline offers additional suggestions to consider at this link.

Although reaching out to someone who might be experiencing partner abuse may seem like a touchy subject to talk about, it can only help. A simple question reminds them you care about their well-being and will believe them.

So, if you suspect that someone is experiencing partner abuse, just ask and be prepared with resources. Write down the GreenHouse17 24-Hour hotline number to have on hand. That’s 800-544-2022.

Additional thoughts from GreenHouse17 staff: Remember to respect decisions made by someone who his being abused, even if you don’t agree with these decisions. She or he is the only one who truly understands the level of danger faced. Someone who is being abused may leave and return to the abuser several times before permanently fleeing the abuse. Avoid judging this decision, and please don’t threaten to stop being there for someone if they choose to return. This is when they need you most.

This post is part of this year’s 17 Days/17 Ways Campaign to end intimate partner abuse.

“It takes two to tango.”

“They’re having a lovers’ quarrel.”

“What did she do to provoke it?”

We’ve probably all heard friends and family say things like this before. Recent discussions related to the #WhyIStayed and #WhyILeft hashtags address the assumptions of such statements.

These sentiments blame the victim.

Speak out when you hear someone using victim-blaming language. Chances are they don’t know they’re doing it. You can say something like “Did you know the words we choose  sometimes blame victims?”  Then let explain how.

Talking about the power and control associated with intimate abuse is always a good place to start. Your discussion might address how the physical, emotional, and financial violence make it very difficult for someone to leave. Very real threats of escalated violence and harm inform the decisions victims make. Responding to well-meaning questions like “Why do they stay?” with better questions like “I wonder what barriers did they faced to leaving?” can also be effective.
w
Open a dialogue. Help someone understand how language affects perspective, and how the wrong language can be dangerous.

(Video courtesy of CNN from Youtube.)

This post is part of this year’s 17 Days/17 Ways Campaign to end intimate partner abuse.

You would call 911 if you saw a drunk driver strike a pedestrian.

You might even call the police if your neighbors are playing loud music.

What if you heard or saw intimate partner abuse?

Many people consider intimate partner abuse to be a private family matter. Bystanders and witnesses often exempt themselves from taking action with thoughts like, “It isn’t my business,” or “I don’t want to get involved.” We believe intimate partner violence is a community issue and requires a community response. This means everyone must respond in safe, constructive ways.

You should never physically intervene. This could be dangerous. Dialing 911 should always be a first response. Setting off a car or property alarm could distract the abuser until law enforcement arrives. Remember to consider your personal needs for anonymity. Many times helpers are reassured if they know their identity will remain confidential.

Take a few minutes today to really think about how you would respond in a safe way. Somebody’s life may depend on it.

(Trigger warning: this video includes a survivor’s testimony that recounts her physical abuse.)

(Video via Youtube.)

This post is part of our 17 Days/17 Ways Campaign to end intimate partner abuse.

The first way to help end intimate partner abuse during Domestic Violence Awareness Month is easy. Change your profile pics on social media to stand in solidarity with survivors.

You’ll find eight different profile pic options  in the slideshow below this post.

Kentucky’s theme this year is “Wear some purple with your pink.” That’s because Domestic Violence Awareness Month shares October with Breast Cancer Awareness Month. We’ve created pinked-out versions of each design so you can raise awareness for both issues at the same time.

The process to change your profile pic is a little different on every social media site. Here’s how you do it on Facebook:

• Right-click (PC), CTRL-click (MAC), or long-click on your favorite profile pic
• Save the image to  your computer or mobile device.
• Go to your profile and hover over your profile picture.
• Click the Update Profile Picture option and select upload a photo.
• Browse the files on your computer or mobile device to find the saved pic.

[slideshow_deploy id=’1936′]

Remember to update your status so your friends know why you changed your pic. Here are some ideas:

• I just changed my profile pic for Domestic Violence Awareness Month. I stand in solidarity with survivors of intimate partner abuse.
• For the next month, my profile will be purple and pink to show my support for survivors of breast cancer and domestic violence.
• One in three is one too many. I am committed to ending intimate partner abuse in our communities!

This post is part of our 17 Days/17 Ways Campaign to end intimate partner abuse.

People are talking about intimate partner violence. It’s in the news. Our friends, family and co-workers are having important conversations about barriers to leaving, reasons for staying, and abuser accountability. These dialogues are timely because October 1 marks the launch of National Domestic Violence Awareness Month.

And over the next 17 days, we will be sharing ways can help end intimate partner abuse. Our 17 Days/17 Ways campaign reflects our organization’s approach to our mission. We believe intimate partner violence is a community issue that requires a community response.

Each and every one of us can nurture lives harmed by intimate partner abuse. In small and big ways, your actions demonstrate intolerance for violence and embrace the needs of survivors.

Look to our Facebook page, Twitter feed, or this blog to follow the campaign. And please share the information with abandon!

Kroger has committed to donating a portion of purchases made with Kroger Plus Cards to the nonprofit organization of your choice. And we sure hope you’ll choose us!

It just takes a couple of minutes to register your Kroger Plus Card for the Community Rewards Program. Here is how you do it:

• Click on this link —-> https://www.kroger.com/i/community/community-rewards
• Choose “Sign in” if you already have an account with Kroger or “Create an Account” if you don’t.
• Then, register your card using the number on your Kroger card or your alternative ID number.
• Next, search for GreenHouse17.  (You could just search “green” and we’ll pop up.)
• Just click on our name.

We’re planning a U-Pick Day on the farm! Get together a group of family and friends for a fun day of flower picking on our farm.

Saturday, August 23
10 a.m. to 2 p.m.
On our farm – Request directions here
$10 per bucket

Our beautiful flowers are field-grown by our staff and strong survivors of intimate partner abuse. More than a dozen varieties of flowers available! Every bucket picked helps survivors on the journey of healing. And shows them the community truly cares. Remember to wear comfortable clothes, and bring your own bucket and clippers if you’ve got ’em. Rain or shine, family-friendly event. Cash, check, and credit accepted.