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Survivors of intimate partner abuse leave behind so much when they flee violence.

Homes.

Jobs.

Friends and family.

Pets.

Some survivors have time to pack a bag of essential clothing and keepsakes that matter to them. Others arrive at our shelter with just the clothes on their backs. Children in shelter especially miss their favorite stuffed animals and toys, and very few survivors are able to flee with everyday items that bring comfort like warm slippers or a favorite coffee mug.

A donation drive is a great way for school, community and faith groups to take a collective stand against intimate partner abuse and support survivors.

Our Right Now Wish List
Our shelter is always in need of new socks, twin-size bedding, and robes for survivors. Right now we could sure use some basic supplies like toilet paper and feminine hygiene products.

We update the wish list on the right of this page every month or so.  Send us a note if you’d like to connect about planning a collection or need directions to deliver your donations to shelter.

Holiday Wish List
Winter is just around the corner, and it’s not too early to start thinking about holiday donation drives.

More than 100 adults and their dependent children surviving intimate partner abuse this winter will look to us for holiday help. At any given time about half of our shelter residents are children.

Your purchase and delivery of holiday gifts for survivors of all ages really makes a difference. Follow this link for our holiday wish list.

Gently Used Donations
People often ask if we accept donations of gently used clothing and furniture. We sure wish we could, but storage limitations at our shelter make it difficult.

We’re lucky to have some amazing community partners that help. Area Goodwill locations will happily accept gently loved clothing on our behalf, and our friends at the Lexington Habitat for Humanity ReStore accept gently used appliances for survivors.

Just drop off your donations during their regular operating hours, and tell the customer service agent that it’s for GreenHouse17. They’ll ask you to complete a special donation form. Then survivors who are receiving our services will receive shopping vouchers in the value of your donation.

This post is part of our 17 Days/17 Ways campaign to take a stand against intimate partner abuse.

Liking and following partners in the mission to end intimate partner abuse is a great way to engage in the mission and advocate for survivors.  We hope you already like us on Facebook and follow us on Twitter and Instagram. And here are some of the organizations we follow. What organizations and businesses committed to ending intimate partner violence did we miss? Leave a comment to let us know.

100 Women
Facebook
A grassroots, all-volunteer women’s advocacy and philanthropic group serving the Bluegrass region of Kentucky, with a particular focus on the needs of women, children, families.

Bluegrass Rape Crisis Center
Facebook
An organization committed to ending sexual violence through crisis intervention, therapy, advocacy and education.

Chrysalis House, Inc.
Facebook
Supporting central Kentucky women and their families in recovery from alcohol and other drug addiction.

Dress for Success Lexington
Facebook
Empowering women in our community and change their lives.

Glean KY
Facebook
Gathers and redistributes excess fruits and vegetables to nourish Kentucky’s hungry.

Grow Appalachia
Facebook
Planting seeds for a sustainable future by providing families in Central Appalachia with the tools to grow nutritious food.

Heart of Kentucky United Way
Facebook
Promotes the common good by focusing on Education, Income, and Health in Boyle, Garrard, Lincoln, and Mercer counties.

ZeroV
Facebook
Ending intimate partner violence, promote healthy relationships and engage communities through social change, economic empowerment, educational opportunities and other prevention strategies.

Kentucky Association of Sexual Assault Programs
Facebook
Promoting prevention and public awareness regarding sexual violence and related issues.

Mitchell Family Foundation
Facebook / Twitter
UK Coach Mitchell’s family foundation believes in strength of character, and we work tirelessly for its cultivation in our community.

MOLLY MAID of Greater Lexington
Website
Donating a dime of every clean to support survivors of intimate partner abuse.

The Nest
Facebook
The Nest – Center for Women, Children and Families offers child care, counseling services, parenting classes and crisis care in Lexington.

Plantory
Facebook / Twitter
The Plantory is Lexington’s nonprofit center for incubation, organizational support, coworking, and cross-sector collaboration.

Seedleaf
Facebook / Twitter
Nourishing communities by growing, cooking, sharing, and recycling food in Lexington, KY.

Violence Intervention and Prevention (VIP) Center
Facebook
Shaping a violence-free campus at the University of Kentucky.

United Way of the Bluegrass
Facebook / Twitter
Improving the lives of all Central Kentuckians.

This post is part of our 17 Days/17 Ways campaign to take a stand against intimate partner abuse.

On average, three women are killed by an intimate partner every day in our nation. Each year the Kentucky Coalition Against Domestic Violence (KCADV) compiles a list of Kentucky victims who were murdered by their intimate partner.

This year 21 names were added to the list.

Each of these victims was someone’s daughter, mother, friend or colleague. We honor their memory by providing safety and healing services for survivors, and we commit to ending intimate partner abuse in their honor.

Maybe you just read these names quietly to yourself today. Maybe you speak them from a podium during a meeting or faith service this week. We just ask that you speak their names.

• Cynthia Beasley, 60, Jefferson County
• Elizabeth Blevins, 85, Fayette County
• Ellen Cain, 42, Meade County
• Brystal Chambers, 21, Henderson County
• Nancy Coomer, 84, Muhlenberg County
• Erin Cully, 26, Kenton County
• Nicole Hiles, 35, Grant County
• Christina Joslin, 43, Jefferson County
• Lorine LaBombard, 37, Barren County
• Goldia Massey, 50, Fayette County
• Karyn Meeks, 39, Taylor County
• Porcia Mills, 24, Jefferson County
• Amy Ndao, 38, Jefferson County
• Tracy Owen, 19, Logan County
• Crystal Parker, 25, Jefferson County
• Shannon Puryear, 37, Jefferson County
• Lisa Roach, 38, Christian County
• Shalayna Skaggs, 32, Larue County
• Kim Thomas, 34, Graves County
• Melissa Vaughn Green, 33, Logan County
• Monica Wells, 34, Pulaski County

This list has been compiled from public media sources and represent victims killed by intimate partners and/or cases charged against an intimate partner from October 1, 2013 to December 31, 2014. Learn more about ZeroV’s Speak My Name project here.

This post is part of our 17 Days/17 Ways campaign to take a stand against intimate partner abuse.

Have you visited our Etsy Shop? Our shop sells self-care products that are Handmade by Survivors. Every product is natural, nourishing and made on the farm that surrounds our emergency shelter.

Making products such as lip balms, salves, and soaps has a special connection to our mission. The process provides work-based healing and small-business experience for survivors, while generating funding for our services.

“The farm has given us a sense of purpose and provides a loving family atmosphere that most of us lack and genuinely need.”

This unique approach to survivor services has received the national Mary Byron Project Celebrating Solutions Award, Kentucky Nonprofit Network Innovative Nonprofit Award, Center for Nonprofit Excellence Pyramid Award for Social Innovation, and the Kentucky Housing Corporation Innovation Award.

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We believe handmade is healing, and we believe in making quality products. Here are some comments from customers:

• “Love the scents and the way the products leave my skin.”
• “Great products! I couldn’t have been happier with my purchase.”
• “Smells awesome and makes my skin and lips super soft!”
• “Lip balm and body balm are wonderful on winter dried skin!”
• “This soap is wonderful. Leaves the skin feeling soft and clean. Would purchase again.”

Right now our Salve-ation Herbal Formula Body Balm is on sale for half off. And as  a special thank you for your support of survivors, we are offering a 17% discount on purchases made from our Etsy shop through Saturday, October 17 at 11:59 p.m. Just enter the coupon code 17WAYS when you check out.

This post is part of our 17 Days/17 Ways campaign to take a stand against intimate partner abuse.

Futures Without Violence reports 15.5 million children in the United States have been exposed to intimate partner violence at least once in the past year. Children know the abuse is happening. They overhear the arguing and see the bruises.

It was my fault.

 

I am unlovable and unworthy of love.

 

I should have been able to stop it.

On any given day, about half of the residents at our emergency shelter are children. Some studies suggest that 40-60% of children who live in homes where violence occurs are being physically and/or emotionally abused, too.

Trigger alert – This video contains chilling audio of a 911 call.

Trailer for The Children Next Door from CDV Association.

Although every child responds differently to the violence, research finds common age-specific responses. These effects are compounded by the duration and severity of the abuse.

Pregnant women who are abused are at higher risk of miscarriage.

Infants may experience developmental delays, excessive separation anxiety, sleep disturbances, disruptions in feeding schedule, and failure to thrive.

School-age children often exhibit depression, anxiety, and sometimes aggression alongside physical symptoms such as headaches, stomachaches, bed-wetting, and sleep disturbances.

For many teens, poor academic performance or the need to achieve perfect academic performance is common, as well feelings of responsibility for their siblings or abused parent. Drug and alcohol abuse and running away from home often occur.

Children deserve a safe home and a life free of violence.

Age-appropriate safety plans can protect children from harm. And the support of trusted adults is key. The National Child Traumatic Stress Network has compiled easy-to-use resources for parents, teachers, and service providers. You can download the pdf at this link. These words matter:

I believe you.

 

It’s not your fault.

 

Anger and frustration are OK, but violence is not.

 

Feeling angry at your parents doesn’t mean you don’t love them.

Call our hotline if you are worried about a child exposed to intimate partner violence. Our counselors are available 24-hours a day, every day of the year to safety plan and provide resources: 800-544-2022.

This post is part of our 17 Days/17 Ways campaign to take a stand against intimate partner abuse.

It’s easy to get caught up our busy lives and forget to examine our own behaviors. Pausing to reflect on our communication and relationships from time to time is healthy. Self-examination helps us to identify areas for improvement and act with integrity.

Is your behavior in family relationships, at the workplace, and in friendships should free from emotional, verbal, and physical aggression? Honestly ask yourself if you occasionally exhibit these behaviors:

• Embarrass or make fun of your partner in front of your friends or family?
• Minimize your partner’s accomplishments or goals?
• Manipulate your partner to make the decision you want them to make?
• Call, text, or email your partner several times a day to check up rather than check in?
• Use drugs or alcohol as an excuse for saying hurtful things to your partner?
• Blame your partner for how you feel or act?
• Prevent your partner from spending time with family or friends?

Healthy relationships take time and energy. Leading a violence-free life requires discipline. And often requires us to recognize unhealthy learned behaviors. The only way to have a healthy relationship is to work at it, and working at it takes practice.

This post is part of our 17 Days/17 Ways campaign to take a stand against intimate partner abuse.

Candy Lightner’s voice changed drunk driving laws.

Lilly Ledbetter’s voice protected women in the workplace.

Todd Beamer’s voice coordinated passengers to thwart a terrorist airstrike on the Pentagaon.

Ryan White’s voice changed our understanding of HIV/AIDS.

If one voice can shift national and international history, then your voice really matters right here in the central Kentucky community. What would happen if every person in your neighborhood took a stand against intimate partner abuse? What if every central Kentucky resident supported survivors?

Imagine if each and every one of us believed that our voice matters and…

• Changed our profile pics and shared information about intimate partner abuse on social media.
• Attended events to support survivors and violence prevention in our community.
• Spoke up when friends and family blame use victim-blaming language.
• Made the connection between human and animal abuse, and committed to protecting family pets, too.
• Reached out to someone in need to provide support and resources.
• Though about how we’d respond if witness to intimate partner abuse.
• Volunteered our time and talents to help local shelters and organizations.
• Honored the unique barriers faced by LGBTQ survivors.
• Talked to young people about healthy relationships at home, school and places of worship.
• Organized a donation drive for the shelter!
• Supported organizations that support survivors in our community.
• Spoke the names of victims who are no longer with us.
• Read, watched, and listened to stories of survival to understand the issue more.
• Purchased Handmade by Survivors products to support survivor healing and self-sufficiency.
• Learned more about the effects of intimate partner abuse on children.
• And honestly reflected on our own behavior.

Your voice matters. ​Your ideas, words, and actions make a difference. Take a stand against intimate partner abuse this month and every month.

This post is part of our 17 Days/17 Ways campaign to take a stand against intimate partner abuse.

Combine dancing and fitness and hearts for survivors of intimate partner violence and you have a shimmying fun afternoon that gives back! With the sponsorship of Altrusa International of Lexington, the wonderful Zumba community has put together an event they are calling “HUGS” and collecting items needed for survivors as well as donations.

Never tried Zumba before? Here is what their website says about the classes (they sound super fun!): “We take the “work” out of workout, by mixing low-intensity and high-intensity moves for an interval-style, calorie-burning dance fitness party. Once the Latin and World rhythms take over, you’ll see why Zumba® Fitness classes are often called exercise in disguise. Super effective? Check. Super fun? Check and check.”

The event will take place at the Lyric Theater (300 E. 3rd Steet, Lexington) from 3:00 – 5:00pm this Sunday, the 27th. We are so excited to have staff participating and meeting the fun loving Zumba community! Thank you, Altrusa International and Zumba!! We are grateful for your support of strong survivors…we too believe in healthy bodies help in healing!!!

https://www.facebook.com/events/901409179906601/

Did you go to Crave Lexington this year? Did someone direct you where to park and you donated $5? Did you receive a flyer that day, handed to you by a smiling volunteer with our info on it?

Then we need to thank you!! Big time!!

Our Board of Directors, Executive staff, and the bestest volunteer coordinator ever, Helue Shalash, just accepted our proceeds check from Smiley Pete Publishing today at shelter!

And obviously we could barely keep our knees from buckling!