It’s easy to get caught up our busy lives and forget to examine our own behaviors. Pausing to reflect on our communication and relationships from time to time is healthy. Self-examination helps us to identify areas for improvement and act with integrity.

Is your behavior in family relationships, at the workplace, and in friendships should free from emotional, verbal, and physical aggression? Honestly ask yourself if you occasionally exhibit these behaviors:

• Embarrass or make fun of your partner in front of your friends or family?
• Minimize your partner’s accomplishments or goals?
• Manipulate your partner to make the decision you want them to make?
• Call, text, or email your partner several times a day to check up rather than check in?
• Use drugs or alcohol as an excuse for saying hurtful things to your partner?
• Blame your partner for how you feel or act?
• Prevent your partner from spending time with family or friends?

Healthy relationships take time and energy. Leading a violence-free life requires discipline. And often requires us to recognize unhealthy learned behaviors. The only way to have a healthy relationship is to work at it, and working at it takes practice.

This post is part of our 17 Days/17 Ways campaign to take a stand against intimate partner abuse.