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Talk to Young People

September 26, 2024By

1 in 3 teens will experience physical, sexual, or emotional abuse by someone they are in a relationship with before they become adults.

Having conversations now can help young people in your life identify red flags when it’s time to start dating. Share and model what a healthy relationship looks like – talk about respect, equality, safety, and trust.

Make sure they know dating abuse is not just physical. Dating abuse is a pattern of behaviors used to gain or maintain power and control over a partner. Read about the different types of abuse. 

love is respect

A project of the National Domestic Violence Hotline, love is respect offers lots of good resources.

The Parent Discussion Guide includes conversation starters about healthy relationships, including the essential elements of respect, communication, trust, boundaries, honesty, and equality.

This online quiz can help a young person in your life answer the question, “Is your relationship healthy?” And teens and tweens can text “love is” to 22522 to check in with a peer advocate about their relationship. 

How about you?

We want to be good role models. That can sometimes mean un-learning behaviors that helped us cope and survive. Taking a close look at our own behavior can help our children see and understand healthier strategies. Parenthood offers a constant reminder that we are still growing and changing, too.

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Ask Yourself Honestly

September 26, 2024By

Is your behavior truly violence free?

Healthy relationships require self-awareness. That means you want to find ways to express how you’re feeling, practice active listening, and work together to find solutions — even when you disagree. By practicing healthier relationship habits and modeling them for others, you contribute to ending intimate partner abuse.

Is your behavior in family relationships, at the workplace, and in friendships free from emotional, verbal, and physical aggression? Honestly ask yourself if you occasionally exhibit these behaviors:

  • Embarrass or make fun of your partner in front of your friends or family?
  • Minimize your partner’s accomplishments or goals?
  • Manipulate your partner to make the decision you want them to make?
  • Call, text, or email your partner several times a day to check up rather than check in?
  • Use drugs or alcohol as an excuse for saying hurtful things to your partner?
  • Blame your partner for how you feel or act?
  • Prevent your partner from spending time with family or friends?
  • Verbally or emotionally manipulated someone to get even or gain power?

Healthy relationships take time and energy. Leading a violence-free life requires discipline and often requires us to recognize unhealthy learned behaviors. The only way to have a healthy relationship is to work at it, and working at it takes practice.

Don’t just read this.

Follow this link for more ways to support survivors and end domestic violence.

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rainbow over shelter LGBTQIAAnnual Report

Crime Victims Fund Stabilization Act

September 10, 2024By

Information, images, and links in this post were developed by National Network to End Domestic Violence and ZeroV, Kentucky’s coalition of domestic violence programs.

Your voice to support the Crime Victims Fund Stabilization Act is critically important! Victim safety and healing are on the line.

Funding for victim services is still in jeopardy, which could endanger victims if Congress doesn’t act now. The Crime Victims Fund Stabilization Act offers solutions.

The Victims of Crime Act (VOCA) has suffered critical reductions for the past five years. Recent support from the KY General Assembly has been a tremendous help while we navigate the funding cuts. The Crime Victims Fund (CVF) Stabilization Act offers a permanent fix.

VOCA is the primary source of federal grant funding for victim services, including services for survivors of domestic violence, child abuse, sexual assault, stalking, trafficking, attempted homicide, drunk/drug-impaired driving, and other crimes. Every year, Congress decides how much money to release from the CVF as part of the annual appropriations process.

Neither VOCA or the CVF Stabilization Act is tax-payer funded.

The CVF Stabilization Act temporarily deposits leftover receipts, after whistleblowers have been paid and the federal government has been made whole, from False Claims Act actions into the Crime Victims Fund.

Email or call your Members of Congress to urge them to cosponsor and pass the CVF Stabilization Act. ZeroV, Kentucky’s coalition of domestic violence programs, has made the process easy. Follow this link to take action!

Together, we can protect services for Kentucky survivors. And help domestic violence programs, rape crisis centers, child advocacy centers, and other victim service organizations keep their doors open.

Email Your Members of Congress

Follow the link above to send an email urging support for the Crime Victims Fund Stabilization Act.

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person with headphones leaning against treeBlog

New Spotify Playlists!

September 5, 2024By

A new collection of songs for people who support survivors 💜

Trigger alert: If you are a survivor, this post could trigger memories. If you need to talk to someone, remember our hotline is available 24-hours a day: 800-544-2022. 

We’re excited to share three Spotify playlists curated by our advocates and staff. 

Do you have a song suggestion you’d like to see on our playlists? Message us on Instagram or Facebook to share.

Follow us on Spotify!

Click the link above to visit our Spotify profile.

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olive's apron tea cupsAnnual Report

Olive’s Apron

August 23, 2024By

“This is making my momma heart so happy.”

Thanks to the generosity of Olive’s Apron, a charming tea shop and bakery in Lexington, a few moms and daughters living at the shelter got to experience the most magical tea party.  

The tea party room was a fairytale. We got to dress up in fairy wings and with magic wands in hand, we were treated to beautifully arranged trays of cupcakes, cheesecake mousse, sandwiches, and other delicious treats. The Olive’s Apron team went above and beyond to make us feel cared for. 

“It was such a special, sweet day,” said Hallie, our community engagement coordinator. Advocate Finley added, “It was a fairy tea party dream. We had so much fun!”

About Olive’s Apron 

Olive’s Apron owner Ashley Crossen named the shop after her great-granny, Olive. Her photo, along with her rolling pin and biscuit cutter, holds a place of honor on the mantle in the shop. 

You can stop by for treats and tea Wednesday – Sunday. They also offer afternoon tea, tea parties, and custom cakes and cupcakes.

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paige swope standing in front of shelter doorsAnnual Report

A Clean Start

August 5, 2024By

“I endured every form of abuse from a partner for several years.”

Paige Swope holds the Ms. Kentucky Festivals 2023 title, and her platform is awareness for intimate partner abuse.

“I endured every form of abuse from a partner for several years,” she shares. “Women, and especially children, who are suffering through a domestic violence relationship lay heavy on my heart.”

Paige began her support for our organization during this year’s Shop & Share event in February. “It brought tears to my eyes seeing how much support the community was giving.”

The experience inspired Paige to do more. She recently organized an online donation drive for self-care items to support survivors and their children living at the shelter.

“There were many times I went days without brushing my teeth, combing my hair, or showering,” she remembers. “I want women and children to never have to worry about having access to basic hygiene necessities.”

“It took me years to physically and mentally heal from the abuse I endured, and now that I am free, I want nothing more than to be able to give back and contribute to such an important organization.”

Read the Summer 2024 Issue of Bloom

This is one article from our print newsletter. Follow the link above to read the full issue!

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attendees in photo boothAnnual Report

AAWD & UK College of Dentistry Partnership

July 29, 2024By

Dental health matters to the physical and emotional well-being of survivors.

Many have been denied medical care and suffered tooth trauma before fleeing the abuser.

For nearly two decades, a partnership with the American Association of Women Dentists (AAWD) at the University of Kentucky College of Dentistry has responded to the need.

Seven survivors are currently receiving dental care and treatment from the university’s Student Dental Clinic.

AAWD members organize an annual fundraiser to replenish the survivor dental fund. This year’s event, Strut Your Smile, included a fashion show and silent auction.

“We get to fundraise, and then see them as a patient,” shares Ciara Sandefur, past president of the university’s AAWD chapter and Strut Your Smile committee member. “I think that is so cool.”

One survivor who received dental care and treatment through the AAWD partnership shares, “It’s given me my life back. I’m able to smile. I’m able to laugh again. I’ve had people tell me, ‘You’ve got a beautiful smile.’”

Read the Summer 2024 Issue of Bloom

This is one article from our print newsletter. Follow the link above to read the full issue!

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darlene and pearse lyons foundationAnnual Report

Thank You Pearse Lyons ACE Foundation!

July 22, 2024By

Dr. Pearse Lyons founded Alltech with the vision of sustaining and nourishing the world’s plants, animals, and people.

A recent $100,000 donation from the Pearse Lyons ACE Foundation to support our mission echoes this commitment.

The generous gift, made possible by the success of the second annual Alltech Make a Difference Golf Scramble, expands on previous investments in our small farm.

“A contribution to GreenHouse17 creates a home for healing and regeneration, as well as the ability to serve thousands of survivors each year through legal advocacy, affordable housing assistance, children’s safe exchange and visitation, and countless other services,” said Deirdre Lyons, Alltech’s co-founder and director of corporate image, design and construction.

“GreenHouse17 saves and transforms lives,” said Dr. Mark Lyons, president and CEO of Alltech. “Our partnership goes beyond the funds we can donate but extends to exchanging ideas around future fundraising opportunities and business outlets that help to further their mission, which we profoundly believe in.”

“We can’t do it alone,” says Darlene Thomas, our executive director. “Ending intimate partner abuse must be a community effort. Alltech’s longtime support for our farm’s goals to foster stability for survivors and generate sustainable revenue for our mission is a testament to the possibilities of partnership.”

Read the Summer 2024 Issue of Bloom

This is one article from our print newsletter. Follow the link above to read the full issue!

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Summer on the Farm

July 15, 2024By

“The farm awakens a part of me that makes me feel strong and peaceful.”

The summer months are busy on our 40-acre property. From healthy cooking workshops using vegetables from the farm to trauma-informed yoga under the pavilion, residents reflect and find healing in lots of ways.

Although many adult survivors living in shelter and transitional housing take part in the farm’s six-week curriculum to develop job skills while earning a weekly stipend, the commitment can be too physically or emotionally intensive for survivors who have recently escaped abuse.

“The healing garden allows survivors to be even more involved with our therapeutic horticulture and farm-to-table dining programs,” explains Hattie, a farm advocate. “Residents can help tend to flowers, vegetables, and herbs that will eventually make their way into the shelter.”

This garden is a space reserved for survivors and their children to experience the benefits of nature together without worries of making mistakes. There’s something special about eating a dinner made with ingredients you helped grow and harvest.

“It’s a chance for residents of all ages to come and experience the healing powers of the farm,” adds Ryan, an advocate focused on nature-based experiences. “Going outside is important for our brains and bodies. To come out and spend just a couple hours learning a new skill or interacting with a living thing can really make a difference in a day.”

Nature-based healing on the farm is supported by grants from United Way of the Bluegrass, Lexington-Fayette Urban County Government Extended Social Resources, and BGCF365.

Read the Summer 2024 Issue of Bloom

This is one article from our print newsletter. Follow the link above to read the full issue!

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chelsea standing in front of shelter doorsBlog

Chelsea’s Story

July 11, 2024By

“My life and stability were up in the air.”

“I was scared and trying to leave this relationship, trying to get my ducks in a row.”

A childhood friend recommended she reach out to ask for our support. Chelsea was pregnant when she and her two-year-old arrived at the emergency shelter.

“I would spend hours walking back and forth on the front porch with him in the stroller. I couldn’t get him to sleep and didn’t want to disturb anyone else.”

Those first few weeks living at the shelter weren’t easy. “I was hyper-focusing and overthinking everything. It was really hard on me, being pregnant. My life and stability were up in the air.”

She stayed busy on purpose. “I was meeting with my advocates, doing therapy, or doing groups. We would talk about boundaries and red flags, green flags, even yellow flags.”

During one group activity, Chelsea remembers writing a note to her younger self and a note to the abuser to burn in the fire pit.

“We talked about boundaries and coping techniques. I always did the mommy and me groups. We did pottery and yoga under the pavilion.”

Although put on bed rest during the final weeks of her pregnancy, Chelsea was able to move into a transitional apartment with her son before the baby was born.

“I was in a different elementary school each grade of the year, so stability was always a real big thing for me. When I had kids, I knew that I needed stability because I never had it.”

When asked what she would tell someone coming into shelter, Chelsea said, “You’re here to heal. If you come with that mindset, you’re going to feel like a totally different person. But remember not everybody is going to understand what you went through, so not everybody deserves your story.”

This is only part of Chelsea’s story, in her own words, shared with permission.

Read the Summer 2024 Issue of Bloom

This is one article from our print newsletter. Follow the link above to read the full issue!

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