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Stalking Awareness Month

January 11, 2024By

January 2024 is the 20th annual National Stalking Awareness Month (NSAM)

Stalking often co-occurs with intimate partner violence and can be an indicator of other forms of violence.  

All stalkers can be dangerous. Intimate partner stalkers, compared to acquaintance and stranger stalkers, are more likely to threaten and physically assault the victim and their friends and family.  

Did you know stalking can include these behaviors?  

  • Repeated phone calls, texts, or communication on your social media  
  • Sending unwanted gifts to your home or work  
  • Threatening you or your loved ones  
  • Following you or watching you from a distance  
  • Digital harassment, such as tracking your location through an app or showing up at a place you’ve checked into online  

Learn more about the crime and ways to plan for your safety:  

National Day of Action for Stalking Awareness 

SPARC is launching the first National Day of Action for Stalking Awareness on January 18th.  

On January 18, 2003 Peggy Klinke was murdered by her stalker, her ex-boyfriend. 

Learn more about Peggy’s story here. [Trigger warning: The video talks about stalking, murder, and includes clips of Peggy’s 911 call] 

“Peggy had a sparkling personality and would light up a room. As the stalking continued and continued, we saw that shine fade.” – Debbie Riddle, Stalking Activist, Peggy’s sister, and founder of National Stalking Awareness Month

SPARC is bringing back the sparkle on the anniversary of Peggy’s murder and you can help spread awareness.  

On January 18th

  • Post a photo on social media wearing sparkly or shiny clothing or pose in front of sparkly decor
  • Tag SPARC – @followuslegally on Facebook and Instagram
  • Use the hashtags #SparkleAgainstStalking #NSAM2024 #NSAMDayofAction 

Learn more.

Visit SPARC's website.

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Jean Sabharwal Award

January 11, 2024By

Bluegrass Families First is presenting our executive director, Darlene Thomas, with the 2024 Jean Sabharwal Award!

This award recognizes those who have demonstrated passionate advocacy for Lexington’s children and families. Tickets are on sale now for the award luncheon presented by Republic Bank. 

March 8, 2024
11:30 AM
The Kentucky Castle 

From Bluegrass Families First 

Since December 2004, Darlene has served as founder/Executive Director for GreenHouse17.  GreenHouse17, serving 17 central Kentucky counties, is an advocacy agency committed to ending intimate partner abuse and its impact on families and the community.  In her 33-year career as an advocate for survivors of power based violence and their families she has been responsible for direct service, comprehensive program development, and community engagement for social change efforts.  

Ms. Thomas provides leadership for multiple community collaborations and committees; provides expert testimony on legal cases; facilitates professional development training for local, state, national and international forums, and provides consultation for organizations who are seeking strategies to reimagine their services.  

Under her leadership, GreenHouse17 programs and services have received statewide and national awards for Innovation including: Commerce Lexington Nonprofit Community Impact Award, National ‘Shelter of the Year’ Purple Ribbon Award, Theresa Mary Byron Foundation Celebrating Solutions Award, the Kentucky Non Profit Network Innovative Award, the Center for Non Profit Excellency Pyramid Award for Social Innovation and was a Partnership for Freedom/Reimagine Opportunity national finalist.  She currently serves as Past-President and Legislative Chair for the ZeroV,  Kentucky’s domestic violence coalition. 

About Jean Sabharwal 

The Jean Sabharwal Award was inaugurated in February of 2014 during an event held to honor the founding partners of the Family Care Center. The award was presented to Jean Sabharwal, founding director of the Family Care Center. Ms. Sabharwal is a remarkable pioneer whose many years of dedication and advocacy have resulted in brighter futures and better lives for families and young children. 

The award was established by Bluegrass Families First to annually recognize an individual or group who has demonstrated passionate advocacy for Lexington’s children and families. The spirit of this award is fittingly expressed through a beautiful stained glass piece by Lexington artist Dan Barnes.

 

Senate Resolution 

Kentucky Senator Reginald Thomas introduced a resolution to recognize Darlene Thomas for receiving Jean Sabharwal Award from Bluegrass Families First. The Congressional Record of the 2024 Regular Session will commemorate the honor on the date of the award luncheon. 

 

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Children’s Safe Exchange and Visitation Expansion

November 13, 2023By

Children’s safe exchange and visitation services reduce risks for violence while encouraging safety, healing, and healthy parent-child connection.

Community members gathered on November 10th to support the launch of children’s safe exchange and visitation services for residents of Boyle, Garrard, Lincoln, and Mercer counties. Grace Church provides space for services in the children’s wing of their facility in Danville.  

“As a church, we are committed to helping the families and children of our community flourish,” says Director of Ministries Kevin Dilbeck. “We are excited to open some of our space to help meet this need.” 

More than 400 petitions for orders of protection are filed in the region each year. Escalation of violence is common when victims separate from abusive partners, and many survivors and their children risk harm while fulfilling custody agreements.  

When visitation between child(ren) and the non-custodial parent/guardian must be supervised, for example by court order, a specially trained monitor is present to document observations during the visitation. Safe exchanges oversee the transition of child(ren) between parents/ guardians if off-site visitation is allowed. 

No contact occurs between custodial and non-custodial parties during visitations or exchanges. Up to 30 weekly visitations and exchanges will be facilitated when the program reaches operational capacity.  

Shannon Weer coordinates the newest location. Shannon is a former professor in the criminal justice department at Eastern Kentucky University, where she taught domestic violence issues. 

“We provide a space for families where children are kept safe,” Shannon says. 

We commit to prioritizing the safety of children and adults; honoring the nature, dynamics, and impact of intimate partner abuse; and treating participants with fairness and respect. 

Learn more about the program, sign up, and review the FAQs here.

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Alpha Chi Omega Supports Survivors

November 6, 2023By

Educating campus communities is essential to ending intimate partner abuse. 

Ending intimate partner abuse is the national philanthropic focus of Alpha Chi Omega, and members of the University of Kentucky chapter embrace the mission with passion and creativity.  

Educating campus communities is essential to ending intimate partner abuse. Most people report experiencing abuse for the first time between the ages of 18 and 24.  

Katie Smith, Vice President of Philanthropy says, “Alpha Chi Omega works to spread awareness about domestic violence through various fundraising and informative initiatives. We are diligent in our efforts to cultivate a safe and supportive environment within our chapter and on our campus.” 

One of their annual tabling events is ‘Donut Let Love Hurt’ during Domestic Violence Awareness Month, where they pass out information, have students share their green flags in relationships, and of course, donuts.  

The UK chapter of Alpha Chi started in 2016 and their annual fundraising events, Paint Wars and the Derby for Domestic Violence Awareness Gala, have already raised over $100,000 for our mission. 

They also volunteer for our annual Shop & Share event where they take over the Euclid Kroger location, securing many donations for our emergency shelter. 

We are so grateful for Alpha Chi and look forward to many more years of collaboration in creating a safer, more aware, and compassionate community for all. 

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Speak My Name

October 25, 2023By

Today we ask for you to listen as we speak these names. Each name is a life taken by domestic homicide related to intimate partner abuse in Kentucky from September 2022 – August 2023. We speak these names to remember the victims and honor their memory for the children, family, and friends who loved them.

Renee Dorton-Pack, 36
Kierrea Stone-Gonzalez, 23
Robert Penn, 56
Talina Henderson, 47
Stephanie Jackson, 50
Njoki “Mary” Muchemi Stanton, 49
Felicia Peacock, 50
Amberly Harris, 32
Tammy Thorpe, 39
Female, Under 18
Ben-Neisha Sims, 24
Jamie Fowler, 51
Natacha Turner, 35
Rachel Tucker, 27
Tonya Collinsworth, 45
Shelby McIntyre, 42
Amanda Miller-Harrison, 37
Angel Walker, 35
Gaymee Paw, 16
Ashley M. Henning, 37
Ashley Yates, 35
Makayla Walker, 24
Martha Perez-Silva, 21

Speak My Name is an annual project of ZeroV, Kentucky’s state coalition of domestic violence programs. Fifteen of the names spoken were killed by gun violence.

As of July 2023, per KRS 209A.122, the Kentucky Justice and Public Safety Cabinet has produced the first annual DV Data Report. This anonymized data about intimate partner homicides for the calendar year 2022, as reported by KSP and the Administrative Office of the Courts.

ZeroV will continue the tradition of humanizing and honoring the memory of those Kentuckians who lost their lives to a partner or ex-partner through this less formal Speak My Name list. ZeroV attempts to track domestic violence-related homicides in Kentucky through various sources such as reports from our member programs, news articles, and internet searches.

It is a far from perfect method. Please be aware that most reports come at the beginning of the law enforcement/court process, at which point an individual has been charged with homicide. We make no representation of the outcome of these cases or whether the charged individual is found guilty of criminal activity.

24-HOUR HOTLINE 800.544.2022

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Community Care

October 9, 2023By

Although the work to end intimate partner abuse always will be difficult, safer tomorrows are possible in a community that cares about survivors.

We’re grateful to be the charitable partner of the HollerGirl music festival.

HollerGirl Website

Friends from the Fayette County Master Gardener’s Association toured the farm and shelter.

Master Gardener Website

Teens from the Church of Latter Day Saints painted our fence.

Latter Day Saints Website

Volunteers from Gray Solutions helped tend to the summer weeds.

Gray Website

Friends from the Redeemed Christian Church of God supported survivors at shelter.

RCCG Website

We were honored to be a recipient of the Good Neighbors Grant from Bluegrass REALTORS.

Bluegrass REALTORS Website

Read the Fall 2023 issue of Bloom

This is one article from our print newsletter. Follow the link above to read the full issue!

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Shelby’s Story

October 2, 2023By

“Once you see that red flag, you can’t change the color of it.”

He was in recovery and was already one year sober when I met him. We were doing great. Then he slipped up and that’s when I saw his worst demons.

When he put his hands on me the first time, and my children were standing there, I just couldn’t do it.

I watched my mom go through it with her second husband and I didn’t ever want my kids to have those memories of watching their mom be hurt by someone who supposedly loves them.

I went to my friend’s house and looked up shelters. That’s when I came across GreenHouse17. They immediately got a room for me. I was there for six months about five years ago.

At first it was really scary. I’m a single mom with two children. The women across the hall were open-armed and welcoming and so were the staff. It was nice because the transition was hard.

I started going to the groups as much as I could. I learned about self-care and how important that is. Meditation classes helped relieve so much anxiety. I learned about healthy relationships, how to set boundaries, and knowing what red flags look like. And understanding once you see that red flag, you can’t change the color of it. It’s never going to go away.

I utilized everything I could. I started a car savings account. I heard about transitional housing and asked how to apply. It took me some time because I didn’t have my birth certificate.

I finally got the news it was moving day. It was right before the big [shelter] remodel, so I asked if I could have the dresser from my room. I still have it in my new apartment.

They gave me a basket with household supplies and a gift card to ReStore where I found a couch. My church furnished the rest of my apartment.

It’s ok to ask for help because you never know where it’s going to get you. If I hadn’t asked for help, if I hadn’t reached out to GreenHouse17, I wouldn’t be where I am today. I can say they saved my life.

This is only part of Shelby’s story, in her own words, shared with her permission.

Read the Fall 2023 Issue of Bloom

This is one article from our print newsletter. Follow the link above to read the full issue!

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Purple Thursday

September 20, 2023By

Find your fire within to support survivors and call for an end to the abuse. 

October 19 is Purple Thursday, an annual day to show support for survivors during Domestic Violence Awareness Month. This year’s theme is ‘Find Your Fire Within.’ 

Why Purple? 

The color purple is a symbol of peace, courage, survival, honor, and dedication to ending violence. It’s believed the color’s connection to our mission might have begun during women’s suffrage.   

In 1978, thousands of advocates for women’s equal rights wore purple when they marched in Washington, D.C. Today the color honors this history, survivors of abuse, and those lives that have been ended too early.   

Why is Purple Thursday Important? 

Purple Thursday is important to our mission because raising awareness is an essential part of working to end the cycle of abuse.  

It’s time to wear purple shirts, hats, nail polish, ties, and more! It’s time to identify yourself as an advocate and raise awareness. It’s time to let survivors know there’s a large community here to support their path to safety.   

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merry who used our hotline for advice21 Years

24/7 Crisis Hotline

August 21, 2023By

Our 24-hour crisis hotline is answered every day of the year.

Merry’s Story 

Merry is a survivor of intimate partner abuse. Her mother encouraged her to call our hotline.  

“I don’t remember who I talked to, and it was a short conversation. They gave me a lot of advice that I wish I’d taken. It was such a pivotal moment because I had looked at your website so many times over the last few years and questioned ‘is what I’m going through abuse?’

I talked to a lot of people who go through the same thing. They’ll look at that website for months before they decide to call. I think it’s a mental unraveling and acceptance of the situation that you’re in. Because your brain is trying to protect you in that environment so you can keep going. 

The call made me realize I’m a victim of what’s happening to me and I don’t have to accept it anymore. It was huge.” 

Common Questions 

Our hotline receives an average of 15-20 calls each day. You will speak to a compassionate Certified Domestic Violence Advocate who wants to support your specific needs.

Do you have space at the shelter?

Although the shelter has 42 beds, our capacity is always changing. If we aren’t able to provide space at any time, we rely on a strong network of temporary shelter solutions.  

Can my kids come to the shelter with me?

Yes, our shelter is a kid-friendly space. We have a special advocate focused on supporting children and youth. The shelter property includes a fenced playground and lots of swings. 

What about my pets?

Our shelter facility and rural property is pet-friendly. We also have partnerships to help with medical care of pets that have been harmed from abuse. Sometimes the shelter isn’t a good fit for family pets. If this is the case for your pet, we can help identify a temporary caregiver who is dedicated to fostering pets of survivors. 

Can someone come to court with me?

Legal advocates attend family court every day that a domestic violence case is being heard in all 17 counties we serve. 

What support groups do you offer?

We offer many support groups for survivors, and most are available online via Zoom. Find more information here. 

17 Counties 

Some people who need assistance don’t reach out because they don’t need emergency shelter. You don’t have to come to the shelter to receive services.  

Staff of our organization live and work in all 17 counties of our service area – Anderson, Bourbon, Boyle, Clark, Estill, Fayette, Franklin, Garrard, Harrison, Jessamine, Lincoln, Madison, Mercer, Nicholas, Powell, Scott, and Woodford.     

A hotline advocate will connect you with your county’s advocate. Even if you aren’t in these counties, we can direct you to the designated service provider for your area. 

Call us anytime.

800.544.2022

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