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Morgan’s Story

November 11, 2021By

“I am exactly who he told me I couldn‘t be.”

Before my kids and I escaped, I didn’t feel like I had anyone. It was a really low point in my life.

I was seeing a therapist in Lexington, and we came to the realization together that I was in an abusive relationship. At that point, she recommended I reach out to GreenHouse17.

The person on the phone said ‘let’s get you to a shelter.’ I didn’t really feel comfortable doing that, so they gave me the phone number for Kris [advocate]. It was a relief to talk to someone.

I didn’t feel safe meeting her anywhere except my workplace. I brought her in under the guise of a vendor. We found a conference room, and she stayed with me for three hours while I told her my story. Kris was crucial in helping me to escape.

She told me – at this point you’re not leaving, you’re escaping.

I had a small, very tight circle of people who I was able to confide in and trust. I kept in contact with Kris and an attorney, and we got our plan together for my escape.

Initially it was really scary. My sister told me we could live with them for a little while. The day I decided we were leaving, he went to work, and I was acting fairly normal. My sister and brother-in-law pulled up. Within an hour we met with a sheriff’s deputy and got the EPO.

The day at court came. Kris was there. It was crazy and scary, but it was amazing. Everything went in the favor of my kids and me. It’s a long journey. It’s difficult, but you’ll make it, and it’s so worth it. Once you finally take that first breath and realize I’m free for the first time—it’s an indescribable feeling.

My little girl started pre-K and my son is in first grade. We’ve been isolated for years from my family and friends. Now we’re meeting new people and having a blast. I’m now a member of the Attorney General Survivors Council. I’m going to write a book one day. I have no problem sharing my story. I love doing it because I know it’s going to help someone, somewhere—and that’s the goal.

This is only part of Morgan’s story, in her own words, shared with her permission. 

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Heart of Kentucky Steering Committee

November 1, 2021By

The Heart of Kentucky Steering Committee raises awareness & support in Boyle, Garrard, Lincoln, and Mercer counties.

The Heart of Kentucky Steering Committee leads with a spirit of engagement. They formed in February 2019 to build awareness about services to support survivors in the region.

“It has been wonderful to have this committed group supporting our work,” says staff member and Danville resident Mary Trollinger.

Steve Lownds was an inaugural member. He works at Centre College and engaged staff from the school’s Title IX office in awareness projects on campus. “We are excited to continue to bring community members together to spread the word and support survivors,” shares Steve.

The City of Danville has issued proclamations during Domestic Violence Awareness Month the past few years, and the Advocate-Messenger has featured several articles about the mission.

“The steering committee cares about their community and has raised awareness about local services,” says Mary. “You don’t have to travel a long distance to find safety.”

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Speak My Name

October 25, 2021By

Today we ask you to listen for 42 seconds as we speak these names. Each name is a life taken by domestic homicide, related to intimate partner abuse in Kentucky from September 2020 – August 2021.

Although Domestic Violence Awareness Month is coming to a close, we will nurture lives harmed until the violence ends.

Connie Taylor, 74, Simpson County
Victoria Cunningham, 67, Hardin County
Pamela Renee Anderson, 57, Marion County
Donna G. Lay, 57, Whitley County
Carrie McCord, 56, McCracken County
Melinda Goosby, 46, Jefferson County
Jill Clayton, 40, Rowan County
Carmelita Lashaun Wright, 39, Franklin County
Don Ray Collett, 38, Laurel County
Tiffany Kidwell, 32, Kenton/Boone County
Angela Carey, 30, Butler County
Ashley Rountree, 29, Bullitt County
Ericka Canada, 26, Warren County
Hannah Fuller, 23, Daviess County
Nikkia Cope, 22, McCracken County
Esther Meza, 22, Clark County
Anonymous child, 12 years old

Speak My Name is a project of the Kentucky Coalition Against Domestic Violence. This is not an exhaustive list. Only victims about whom the coalition is aware through media outlets and domestic violence programs.

24-HOUR HOTLINE 800.544.2022

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Alex and daughter Maddy from Maid on Netflix21 Years

We’re watching Maid on Netflix – and you should too.

October 13, 2021By

Educate yourself, bring awareness to intimate partner abuse, and support survivors.

Why is Maid on Netflix important? Because it shows the real struggles survivors go through to leave their abuser and the obstacles they face if they’re able to leave.  

Alex struggles with the label of domestic abuse and says, “I’d hate to take a bed from someone that’s been abused for real.”  

Verbal and emotional abuse is intimate partner abuse! Throwing things and punching near a partner is physical abuse. It’s terrifying. As Alex’s friend Danielle tells her – abuse escalates over time. 

This series is important because it shows how isolated Alex was when she left. She had no job, no money, no childcare, and no friends because her circle is tied in with her abuser.  

There is a stigma about people who have been abused. People may think – Why didn’t she just leave? Why did she go back?  

Maid does an exceptional job at showing the hurdles survivors go through. The gaslighting, promising he will change this time, how scary court can be, and so much more.  

So, we’re watching Maid on Netflix, and you should too. To educate yourself, to bring awareness to intimate partner abuse, and to support survivors.

Have you wondered if your relationship is healthy? Do you have a friend you suspect could be suffering from physical or emotional abuse? Whether you just want to talk or you’re ready to initiate services, we will answer your call 24 hours a day, every day of the year – 800-544-2022. 

Further Reading

Lakeisha Goedluck writes about Maid and her own experiences with intimate partner abuse.

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Advocating in the Workplace

October 5, 2021By

44% of US adults say they have experienced the effects of intimate partner abuse at work.

Intimate partner abuse affects every part of a survivor’s life, including at work. Abusers often sabotage a survivor’s work-life as a control tactic. 

As an employer, what can you do to support survivors?  

If an employee starts suddenly missing days of work, or coming in late, not being able to concentrate, or shows signs of physical abuse – how are you going to respond? Do you have workplace policies and procedures in place?  

If not, visit Workplaces Respond for a model workplace policy and other resources to get a plan in place.

Legal Obligations 

Revisions to KRS 209A effective July 2017 require health, school, faith, law, social, and other professionals to provide resources and referrals for suspected victims of domestic violence in Kentucky. 

If you have professional interaction with someone you believe to be a victim of domestic violence, dating violence, or abuse, you must give the person educational materials related to the abuse. This information must include how the victim may access domestic violence programs and protective orders. 

Click here for resources and here to schedule a training at your workplace. 

As a coworker, what can you do to advocate for survivors? 

See if your workplace has a policy on intimate partner abuse. If they don’t, share this statistic – 44% of US adults say they have experienced the effects of intimate partner abuse at work.

It’s important to have a policy in place for survivors. Share this resource with your company. You can search for resources as a coworker, employer, and advocate. 

Safe Space 

As employers and coworkers, we need to be a safe place for survivors to reach for help. If you have a conversation with someone you suspect is being abused –  

  • Communicate your concerns for the employee’s safety. It’s important to ask what changes could be made to make them feel safer. 
  • Tell the employee that you believe them. Listening, listening, listening, is really important. 
  • Refer the employee to a local domestic violence support agency with trained staff. You can call our crisis hotline, too, to ask for help with supporting an employee. 800.544.2022 
  • Be clear that your role is to try to help and not to judge. Don’t belittle or criticize the reasons a survivor stays or returns to the abuser. 

Read more. Let's make some noise.

This is part of a series for Domestic Violence Awareness Month.

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Purple Ribbon Award for Program of the Year

September 16, 2021By

We have received the Purple Ribbon Award for Program of the Year by Domesticshelters.org. A $10,000 grant to support services for survivors accompanies this national honor.

Theresa’s Fund, DomesticShelters.org and experts in the field launched the Purple Ribbon Awards, the first comprehensive awards program honoring shelters, programs, volunteers, and survivors committed to ending intimate partner abuse.

“We all know it’s not easy work. But helping victims, survivors and their families and the relentless pursuit to end domestic violence is absolutely fulfilling and necessary work.” – Award organizers

Gold medallions were awarded to notable nominees across 28 categories earlier this year. GreenHouse17 also was recognized for Most Innovative Service and Best Annual/Impact Report.

Grant Announcement

More than 650 people from 58 states/provinces and 10 countries attended the awards celebration and announcement of grant winners on September 15. Filmmaker Angela Shelton served as the special guest host for the event. 

“It means so much to be honored by fellow advocates in the mission,” remarked Darlene Thomas, our executive director, after learning of the grant award.” She later reflected on the honor in an email to staff and members of our Board of Directors: “Folks from all over the country sent out a huge congratulations to you, your work, your vision and commitment to survivors.”

Fellow Award Winners

We send our congratulations to these and other inspirational award winners:

SOS violence conjugale
Outstanding Awareness Campaign
Quebec, Canada
$7,500 Grant Recipient

G.R.O.W. Foundation
Survivor of the Year (Neisha Himes)
Chesapeake, VA
$5,000 Grant Recipient

Control Alt Delete
Most Innovative Service
Phoenix, AZ
$2,500 Grant Recipient

Laurens County Safe Home
Shelter Turnaround of the Year
Clinton, SC
$2,500 Grant Recipient

Center of Hope
Shelter Employee of the Year (Rachel Enriquez)
Columbia, TN
$2,500 Grant Recipient

About the organizers

DomesticShelters.org was launched in 2014 by Theresa’s Fund, an Arizona-based organization that has been deeply committed and involved in preventing violence against women since 1992. The website has become one of the fastest-growing websites on the topic of domestic violence.

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Celebrating Three Years of the Children’s Safe Exchange & Visitation Program

August 26, 2021By

Nurturing Young Lives

Three years ago on August 23rd, staff and community partners gathered to launch our Children’s Safe Exchange and Visitation program. Continuation of these vital services was necessary after the closure of Sunflower Kids.

More than 8,000 safe visitations and exchanges have been provided since the ribbon-cutting ceremony. Services are provided from two locations in downtown Lexington and Georgetown.

“Children deserve connection and bonding without worrying about conflict, intimidation, control, and further abuse,” says Darlene Thomas, Executive Director.  

Visitation and monitored exchanges are facilitated without contact between adult parties, keeping program participants safe throughout the process. This is also beneficial to the children so they do not have to potentially witness any intimidation, manipulation, or abuse between parents.  

Thank You 

AU Associates donates the program’s Lexington office space, while Georgetown Police provides in-kind space for services in Scott County.  Partnerships with Lexington Police, Friend of the Court, and Family Court judges also support the program.

Startup funds were provided by LFUCG Department of Social Services, through the Department of Special Grants and Programs.

Primary funding for the program now comes from VOCA – Victims of Crime Act – awarded through the Kentucky Justice and Public Safety Cabinet by the U.S. Department of Justice.

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More Information About the Children's Safe Exchange and Visitation Program

For FAQ or to request an intake for this program, click the link above.

This project was supported by Grant Number VOCA-2020-GreenHouse-00109 awarded through the Kentucky Justice and Public Safety Cabinet by the U.S. Department of Justice. The opinions, findings, conclusions, and recommendations expressed in this publication/program/exhibition are those of the author(s) and do not necessarily reflect the views of the Kentucky Justice and Public Safety Cabinet or the U.S. Department of Justice.

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Magical Connections with Tabitha Dial

August 18, 2021By

“When I think about my intuitive reading and your mission, the word magical comes to mind,” Tabitha Dial says. “We’re both caring about the community, as well as the individual, to support them in finding their voice.” 

When Tabitha Dial, an intuitive tarot and tea leaf reader, moved from Colorado to Lexington six years ago, she felt called to support our mission. 

“I have known a few women who have revealed their stories of domestic partner abuse to me, and I know there are many, many unheard stories that remain.” 

Tabitha began her support by offering donation-based readings at Third Street Stuff. Since then, she’s been one of our most engaged social media followers and always finds creative ways to celebrate nature-based healing on social media. 

While a member of the Autumn Vegetable and Herb CSA, Tabitha was inspired to write “Green Soup,” an award-winning poem featured in Kentucky Monthly’s Annual Writers’ Showcase. 

“When I think about my intuitive reading and your mission, the word magical comes to mind,” she says. “We’re both caring about the community, as well as the individual, to support them in finding their voice.” 

Read the summer issue of Bloom!

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Facebook Fundraisers – It’s so easy!

August 13, 2021By

“I believe it’s a cause that deserves more awareness.”

For the past two years, around the time of his birthday, Kellen Macklin launched Facebook Fundraisers to ask his friends and family to make a donation to support GreenHouse17. His efforts have collected $1,250 to support our mission.

“My life hasn’t directly been affected by domestic violence, but I’ve been very close to people whose lives have been for many years. I believe it’s a cause that deserves more awareness.” 

“I was initially pretty apprehensive about using Facebook Fundraisers, but it’s so simple. Maybe takes 30 seconds to set up everything.” 

Donors can choose if their donations are public or private, and Facebook covers processing fees for gifts made to registered charitable organizations. When the fundraiser ends, donations are deposited directly to the organization’s bank account. 

“Even if you only raise a few dollars for whatever organization you choose, it’s more than they had before.”  

Kellen also supports us in other ways. Many nights while bartending at Arcadium in Lexington, he wears a purple mask with the words “support survivors” to spark conversations about our mission. 

This article was included in our print newsletter, Bloom. To read all the articles, click here.

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Home Safe Home

July 28, 2021By

Starting over after abuse takes time. 

Survivors often leave behind more than a home. Many begin again without furniture, clothing, and a vehicle. Sometimes the abuser has maintained power and control by not allowing a survivor to work or sabotaging their employment. Housing advocates help with these challenges.

“I have no family support and had nowhere to go,” shares a survivor who asked to remain anonymous. “I couldn’t afford daycare to work full-time and provide as a single mom.” 

While beginning to heal from the physical and emotional wounds of abuse, survivors meet with housing advocates to create an individualized housing plan. Early conversations imagine possibilities and identify barriers. 

Legal advocacy, credit repair, benefit applications, and budgeting assistance begin to chip away the obstacles. Partnering organizations provide job search, childcare, and other resources to help make the transition possible. Although each survivor needs different types of housing support, most receive temporary rental and utility assistance. 

Some survivors transition to apartments in their home county or near supportive family and friends, while others move to apartments in KCADV Homes Lexington. Twelve of these units are scattered near downtown Lexington, with easy access to public transportation, and twelve cottage-style duplexes are nestled on the backside of the emergency shelter’s property. 

Our housing team partners with dozens of organizations, companies, and landlords to support survivors during the transition to safe, affordable housing. Jubilee Jobs of Lexington offers job search services; Habitat for Humanity ReStore provides vouchers for furniture purchases; and Wildcat Moving, 2 Dudes Moving, and College HUNKS Moving offer services at no cost or reduced fees. 

“I always felt supported while in the program, and my abuser never knew where to find me. I can feel safe and my children can, too.” 

Read the summer issue of Bloom

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