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Advocating in the Workplace

October 5, 2021By

44% of US adults say they have experienced the effects of intimate partner abuse at work.

Intimate partner abuse affects every part of a survivor’s life, including at work. Abusers often sabotage a survivor’s work-life as a control tactic. 

As an employer, what can you do to support survivors?  

If an employee starts suddenly missing days of work, or coming in late, not being able to concentrate, or shows signs of physical abuse – how are you going to respond? Do you have workplace policies and procedures in place?  

If not, visit Workplaces Respond for a model workplace policy and other resources to get a plan in place.

Legal Obligations 

Revisions to KRS 209A effective July 2017 require health, school, faith, law, social, and other professionals to provide resources and referrals for suspected victims of domestic violence in Kentucky. 

If you have professional interaction with someone you believe to be a victim of domestic violence, dating violence, or abuse, you must give the person educational materials related to the abuse. This information must include how the victim may access domestic violence programs and protective orders. 

Click here for resources and here to schedule a training at your workplace. 

As a coworker, what can you do to advocate for survivors? 

See if your workplace has a policy on intimate partner abuse. If they don’t, share this statistic – 44% of US adults say they have experienced the effects of intimate partner abuse at work.

It’s important to have a policy in place for survivors. Share this resource with your company. You can search for resources as a coworker, employer, and advocate. 

Safe Space 

As employers and coworkers, we need to be a safe place for survivors to reach for help. If you have a conversation with someone you suspect is being abused –  

  • Communicate your concerns for the employee’s safety. It’s important to ask what changes could be made to make them feel safer. 
  • Tell the employee that you believe them. Listening, listening, listening, is really important. 
  • Refer the employee to a local domestic violence support agency with trained staff. You can call our crisis hotline, too, to ask for help with supporting an employee. 800.544.2022 
  • Be clear that your role is to try to help and not to judge. Don’t belittle or criticize the reasons a survivor stays or returns to the abuser. 

Read more. Let's make some noise.

This is part of a series for Domestic Violence Awareness Month.

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Your Voice is Powerful

September 23, 2021By

Take a stand against intimate partner abuse during Domestic Violence Awareness Month and every month. 

Your voice is powerful. Believe your voice and actions can make a difference. Be loud. Every action — big or small — creates a community that supports survivors.

What would happen if every person in your neighborhood took a stand against intimate partner abuse? What if every Kentucky resident supported survivors? 

Imagine if each and every one of us believed that our voice and actions matter and… 

Your voice is powerful. Your ideas, words, and actions make a difference. 

Candy Lightner’s voice changed drunk driving laws. Lilly Ledbetter’s voice protected women in the workplace. Ryan White’s voice changed our understanding of HIV/AIDS. Todd Beamer’s voice coordinated passengers to thwart an airstrike on the Pentagon.

And your voice can help end intimate partner abuse in families and our community.

Read more. Let's make some noise.

This is part of a series for Domestic Violence Awareness Month.

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Destroy Myths & Reveal Truths

September 23, 2021By

Let’s destroy myths and reveal truths about intimate partner abuse.

What myths have you heard about intimate partner abuse? It’s easy for a survivor to leave their abuser, right? Maybe you think intimate partner abuse doesn’t happen in your circle. We know these statements aren’t true. Read some common myths below and reveal the truth.

Intimate partner abuse is private and not a social issue. 

Intimate partner abuse affects one in three women and one in four men in Kentucky. We all have to do our part to speak out against it, be active bystanders, and correct inappropriate language when you hear someone victim-blaming. 

Victims provoke their partner’s violence. 

The survivor is never responsible for the abuse. That’s a victim-blaming attitude and the responsibility is always on the abuser. 

It’s easy for a survivor to leave their abuser. 

There are many reasons for not being able to leave – having nowhere to go, fear, financial insecurity, threats to themselves or their children or pets. Leaving the relationship is often the most dangerous time for the survivor.  

Alcohol and drugs cause abuse. 

Abuse is about power and control. Alcohol and drugs may increase abuse, but it’s not the cause. 

Intimate partner abuse is only about physical abuse. 

Again, the abuse is all about power and control. There could also be emotional, financial, sexual, harassment, and/or digital abuse. 

Intimate partner abuse doesn’t happen in my circle. 

That’s statistically unlikely. If you know more than three people, then you know and care about someone who has survived intimate partner abuse. If it’s not someone in your family or close group of friends, you know a survivor from school, work, or place of worship. 

People who are abused have the types of personalities that seek out and encourage abuse. 

A lot of abusers will come off as charming and loving at first and then the abuse can escalate. This is a victim-blaming attitude. 

Intimate partner abuse only affects adults in the household. 

The majority of children in an abusive household will witness the abuse. Studies have shown children who experience intimate partner abuse with their parents exhibit depression, anxiety, learning difficulties, and more.  

Only women are abused by men. 

Women can abuse men, too. And LGBTQIA+ rates of intimate partner violence are similar to, or higher than, heterosexual and cisgender people. 

Intimate partner abuse only happens with older, married couples.  

The majority of people report experiencing abuse for the first time between the ages of 18 and 24. 

Get Help

Have you wondered if your relationship is healthy? Do you have a friend you suspect could be suffering from physical or emotional abuse? Whether you just want to talk or you’re ready to initiate services, we will answer your call 24 hours a day, every day of the year – 800-544-2022.

Read more. Let's make some noise.

This is part of a series for Domestic Violence Awareness Month.

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Fight Injustice

September 23, 2021By

Words are powerful. Choosing your words carefully and using accountable language when discussing intimate partner abuse is something everyone can do. 

Fight injustice by speaking up and speaking out. 

Intent is everything. We have so many teachable moments in our everyday lives that we don’t seize. Whether you are at work or with friends and family, if you hear something disrespectful or degrading – speak out! Don’t do nothing. 

Open a dialogue – let someone see how language affects perspective and how the wrong language can be dangerous. Remind friends, family, coworkers, or anyone else you come across that positive language can change things for the better. 

If you hear someone using abusive or controlling language, say “I don’t appreciate that,” and explain why it is unacceptable. 

We’ve probably all heard friends and family say things like this before —  

“It takes two to tango.” 

“They’re having a lovers’ quarrel.” 

“What did she do to provoke it?”  

These sentiments blame the survivor and you can speak out when you hear someone using this victim-blaming language. Chances are they don’t know they’re doing it. You can say something like “Did you know the words we choose sometimes blame victims?”  Then explain how. 

Talking about the power and control associated with intimate partner abuse is always a good place to start. Your discussion might address how physical, emotional, and financial violence make it very difficult for someone to leave.  

Educate yourself on the power and control wheel of abuse. And always fight injustice by speaking up for survivors.

Read more. Let's make some noise.

This is part of a series for Domestic Violence Awareness Month.

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Purple Ribbon Award for Program of the Year

September 16, 2021By

We have received the Purple Ribbon Award for Program of the Year by Domesticshelters.org. A $10,000 grant to support services for survivors accompanies this national honor.

Theresa’s Fund, DomesticShelters.org and experts in the field launched the Purple Ribbon Awards, the first comprehensive awards program honoring shelters, programs, volunteers, and survivors committed to ending intimate partner abuse.

“We all know it’s not easy work. But helping victims, survivors and their families and the relentless pursuit to end domestic violence is absolutely fulfilling and necessary work.” – Award organizers

Gold medallions were awarded to notable nominees across 28 categories earlier this year. GreenHouse17 also was recognized for Most Innovative Service and Best Annual/Impact Report.

Grant Announcement

More than 650 people from 58 states/provinces and 10 countries attended the awards celebration and announcement of grant winners on September 15. Filmmaker Angela Shelton served as the special guest host for the event. 

“It means so much to be honored by fellow advocates in the mission,” remarked Darlene Thomas, our executive director, after learning of the grant award.” She later reflected on the honor in an email to staff and members of our Board of Directors: “Folks from all over the country sent out a huge congratulations to you, your work, your vision and commitment to survivors.”

Fellow Award Winners

We send our congratulations to these and other inspirational award winners:

SOS violence conjugale
Outstanding Awareness Campaign
Quebec, Canada
$7,500 Grant Recipient

G.R.O.W. Foundation
Survivor of the Year (Neisha Himes)
Chesapeake, VA
$5,000 Grant Recipient

Control Alt Delete
Most Innovative Service
Phoenix, AZ
$2,500 Grant Recipient

Laurens County Safe Home
Shelter Turnaround of the Year
Clinton, SC
$2,500 Grant Recipient

Center of Hope
Shelter Employee of the Year (Rachel Enriquez)
Columbia, TN
$2,500 Grant Recipient

About the organizers

DomesticShelters.org was launched in 2014 by Theresa’s Fund, an Arizona-based organization that has been deeply committed and involved in preventing violence against women since 1992. The website has become one of the fastest-growing websites on the topic of domestic violence.

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Purple Ribbon Awards

September 7, 2021By

We’ve received national Purple Ribbon Awards for Best Shelter (Agency), Most Innovative Program (Farm), and Best Annual/Impact Report (Bloom)!

The Purple Ribbon Awards are new this year! DomesticShelters.org, Theresa’s Fund, and experts in the field came together to launch the first awards program honoring survivors, nonprofits, and advocates working to end intimate partner violence.  

We are winners in three categories! The Purple Ribbon Awards Celebration is on September 15th at 6:30pm. Grants totaling up to $30,000 will be made to select winners. The link to register is below! 

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Register for The Purple Ribbon Awards Celebration

If you register before September 12th, you're entered for a chance to win a $250 Amazon gift card. (Must be present to win)

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Visit our table at DV8 Kitchen!

September 1, 2021By

DV8 Kitchen’s new location is now open and you can eat at the GreenHouse17 table!  

In February, DV8 Kitchen invited 14 nonprofit organizations in the recovery community to paint a table for their new location in Lexington’s East End – 594 E Third St #100. 

Kristin Carpenter, a local artist and member of our staff, painted ours! Her original painting illustrates the benefits of nature-based healing. Lots of sunshine and water nourish flowers and vegetables to grow strong and stand tall in the fields. Our 24-hour hotline in the bottom right corner of the table will help survivors to connect with supportive services. 

DV8 Kitchen is a local restaurant & bakery that employs people in recovery from substance use disorder who are trying to redirect their lives. Their original location on South Broadway has thrived since opening in August 2017.  

The work of DV8 Kitchen is especially important to our mission. Many survivors struggle with substance use while healing from intimate partner abuse. A strong and supportive community is crucial for those on the path to healing and sobriety. 

If you eat at our table, please tag us on social media so we can share it!

Click the link to follow DV8 Kitchen on Facebook!

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Celebrating Three Years of the Children’s Safe Exchange & Visitation Program

August 26, 2021By

Nurturing Young Lives

Three years ago on August 23rd, staff and community partners gathered to launch our Children’s Safe Exchange and Visitation program. Continuation of these vital services was necessary after the closure of Sunflower Kids.

More than 8,000 safe visitations and exchanges have been provided since the ribbon-cutting ceremony. Services are provided from two locations in downtown Lexington and Georgetown.

“Children deserve connection and bonding without worrying about conflict, intimidation, control, and further abuse,” says Darlene Thomas, Executive Director.  

Visitation and monitored exchanges are facilitated without contact between adult parties, keeping program participants safe throughout the process. This is also beneficial to the children so they do not have to potentially witness any intimidation, manipulation, or abuse between parents.  

Thank You 

AU Associates donates the program’s Lexington office space, while Georgetown Police provides in-kind space for services in Scott County.  Partnerships with Lexington Police, Friend of the Court, and Family Court judges also support the program.

Startup funds were provided by LFUCG Department of Social Services, through the Department of Special Grants and Programs.

Primary funding for the program now comes from VOCA – Victims of Crime Act – awarded through the Kentucky Justice and Public Safety Cabinet by the U.S. Department of Justice.

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More Information About the Children's Safe Exchange and Visitation Program

For FAQ or to request an intake for this program, click the link above.

This project was supported by Grant Number VOCA-2020-GreenHouse-00109 awarded through the Kentucky Justice and Public Safety Cabinet by the U.S. Department of Justice. The opinions, findings, conclusions, and recommendations expressed in this publication/program/exhibition are those of the author(s) and do not necessarily reflect the views of the Kentucky Justice and Public Safety Cabinet or the U.S. Department of Justice.

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What We Know About Strangulation

August 25, 2021By

Many people will experience intimate partner violence in their lifetime, and of those, up to 68 percent will suffer near-fatal strangulation by their abuser.

In a recent conversation with legal advocate Stephanie Love, I asked what trends she has noticed over the years in the court system. She talked about strangulation and how it has only been considered a felony since summer 2019 in Kentucky. 

ZeroV, The Mary Byron Project, Lou Anna Red Corn, and many others worked hard to advocate for Senate Bill 70 to be passed and make strangulation a felony in Kentucky. 

Up to 68 percent of intimate partner abuse victims will suffer near-fatal strangulation by their abuser. Some people mistakenly use the word ‘choking,’ but this is a crime meant to stop the victim from breathing.

Defining Strangulation and What it Means for Survivors

The Training Institute on Strangulation Prevention defines strangulation as “the obstruction of blood vessels and/or airflow in the neck resulting in asphyxia.” This type of assault can have serious, permanent, or even fatal damage to the victim’s throat or brain. Symptoms include: 

  • Loss of memory 
  • Loss of consciousness 
  • Chest pain 
  • Bruising on neck 
  • Unable to speak or swallow 

For more signs and symptoms, click here. Warning – this is a very graphic poster, although it’s not a real person depicted.

This crime is often missed by law enforcement and medical professionals because in more than half of cases, there are no visible signs.  The National Domestic Violence Hotline reports that strangulation is a significant predictor of future lethal violence.

If someone has been strangled by a partner in the past, the risk of being killed by that partner is seven times higher.

Get Help

Do you fear your partner will strangle you or worry about the long-term effects of previous strangulation abuse? We will answer your call 24 hours a day, every day of the year – 800-544-2022. 

The featured image was inspired by MobileODT.

Further Reading

Click the link above to open a brochure from Alliance for Hope International about strangulation. There is a ‘visible signs’ drawing that is graphic included on the brochure.

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Magical Connections with Tabitha Dial

August 18, 2021By

“When I think about my intuitive reading and your mission, the word magical comes to mind,” Tabitha Dial says. “We’re both caring about the community, as well as the individual, to support them in finding their voice.” 

When Tabitha Dial, an intuitive tarot and tea leaf reader, moved from Colorado to Lexington six years ago, she felt called to support our mission. 

“I have known a few women who have revealed their stories of domestic partner abuse to me, and I know there are many, many unheard stories that remain.” 

Tabitha began her support by offering donation-based readings at Third Street Stuff. Since then, she’s been one of our most engaged social media followers and always finds creative ways to celebrate nature-based healing on social media. 

While a member of the Autumn Vegetable and Herb CSA, Tabitha was inspired to write “Green Soup,” an award-winning poem featured in Kentucky Monthly’s Annual Writers’ Showcase. 

“When I think about my intuitive reading and your mission, the word magical comes to mind,” she says. “We’re both caring about the community, as well as the individual, to support them in finding their voice.” 

Read the summer issue of Bloom!

This is one article from our print newsletter. Follow the link above to read the full issue!

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